My Name Is Eileen. I Am A Freakazoid. Hello.
... *poke* ... *sniff* ... *poke* ...
Monday, February 13, 2006

i am in PAIN

my stomach has been hurting me since friday. non stop.

when i eat, i feel like barfing. when i sleep, i need to curl up into a ball.

nothing works!

po chai pills / charcoal pills / honey lemon / tea / warm water / cold water / some weirdo pills in my medicine cabinet / tiger balm / cap limau / warm towel

they cannot help meeeee! howhowhow?



it feels like the hulk and king kong have been taking turns using my gut as a punching bag to vent all their pent up sexual frustrations.

and then, when they've finished pummelling me poor tummy, they decide to be friends since they both have pent up sexual frustrations and use my stomach as an organic super stretchy rope on which they play a friendly match of tug of war to determine who has the most chance of scoring with that hot chick that thinks both of them are equally stinky and gross is the strongest.

punching bag + tug of war + stomach = NOT $@^@%#$!^% FUN FOR ME AT ALL!

(even though i'm sure king kong and the hulk - who have shrunken themselves using that ray gun from "HONEY I SHRUNK THE KIDS" - are currently camping out in my stomach, are having oodles of funlaughterpeaceandjoy - at my expense.)



ARGHH!



stoopid stomach.

rubbish body.

i need a new body! i need new body parts! UPGRADE UPGRADE!!

eh. you think i trade in my old body, can get discount or not?



p/s: i don't know why there are so many references to "SEX". this has to do with my STOMACH. not *ahem* other.. regions.

my mind works in bafflingly strange and utterly mysterious ways, man.


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