My Name Is Eileen. I Am A Freakazoid. Hello.
... *poke* ... *sniff* ... *poke* ...
Monday, September 19, 2005

genetic disorder of the brain

the following is an email i received from my mother.

we were planning a family outing to Sizzler for my dad's birthday lunch, where i was supposed to bear the cost for myself and my dad, and my mum would bear the rest.

i had asked her to handle the reservations and let me know the plan.

Dear Bunny,

I haf researched Sizzling's! Und here is de plan for feeding daddy - he cn haf the most expensive $9.99 pork chop main meal (acuarry for kids lah). Anyway you say he cant eat much, izznit?

As for us, orinerry pipple, whoever eat main meal cannot order salad, and Vice versa. or else I pok lah.

So remember, you paying for Dear Ol' Dad and Yerself. (if u like u can oso order kids meal). We save on drinks by smuggling our own wine in, ok? We all drink wine, sammy can haf der bottle (underage).

Err- waddabout cake? u n sammy wann to bake one banananana cake? ask anty to help

i am flabbergasted.

both by my mother's horrendous "engrish" abilities and use of "teeny shortforms" (oso?! haf?! der?! WTF!), as well as her deviousness when it comes to "saving" money.

well, now you all know where i get it from.

insanity and lunacy are genetic. confirmed.

NOTE: yes, most of my mother's horrendous english is done on purpose. which makes it even more insane, when you think about it.

the shortforms, however, i am sad to say, is REALLY how she normally types. sigh.

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